ProfesorElric!
by SarahElric1999
Summary: <html><head></head>Ed gets sent a ridiculous order, *to learn about MAGIC, can ya beleive that?* yet still, it must be important since the fuhrer himself issued them! chappy 6 up!</html>
1. Chapter 1

**H'OKAY YA'LL! Hai there. This is my first fanfic and it's a FMA HP CO. (well duh. Isn't that like everyones first fanfic?) ive decided to make the amestris language German. Because. Its just such a friggin funny accent and it makes ed sound exotic. ENJOY. OR ELSE. I have never owned and never will own HP or FMA. If I did, do you really think I would be writing fanfics?**

The door basically exploded open from the force exerted on it. Roy's smirk widened when he saw the red faced teen standing in the doorway. The short alchemist stormed in and asked immediately, "MUSTANG, WHAT IS THIS?" and slammed the file down on the desk.

"Why, exactly what it looks like Fullmetal. Those are indeed your orders, assigned by the Fuehrer himself. If you look down at the bottom is clearly has his signature. You have been ordered to take the post of Alchemy teacher at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and gain Intel on how magic works. You must also protect a very special person. Harry Potter. As return for that, the Wizards have agreed to try and let us understand magic"

"No way. There is simply no plausible explanation for magic, I'm an alchemist too, you idiot. And why would I get sent to protect some snotty kid?" Suddenly there was a loud crack, and a man burst into being in the middle of the room. Edward and Roy didn't even hesitate, there was an audible snap and clap and the man was trapped in an intricate cage that was made from the tiles on the floor, and very nearly fried from Mustang's attack. Ed thought he had heard him say something like 'protego' while waving a funny looking stick. He guessed that he had used some sort of alchemy and that was why he wasn't just a pile of ash right now. Chuckling softly, the man said, "My apologies. I should have used the door."

A few moments later after the alchemists had calmed down and the newly arrived man assured them that he was there not to harm them and gave Mustang a kind of password, and was out of his "cage", he introduced himself as Albus Percival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore. Ed scoffed a little at the name and his superior gave him a sharp glance. Ed looked at him as if to say, 'Come on, you and I both know that's a ridiculous name.'

Mustang soothed his growing headache by rubbing his fingertips on his temples and felt a need to apologize. "Mr. Albus Brian …Percy Wolfy..erm…."

The old man chuckled heartily and said, "Please, call me Dumbledore."

"Ok, Mr.…. Dumbledore, I am extremely sorry for my subordinate's rude behavior. It won't happen again, now WILL IT, Fullmetal?" and Ed was treated to another sharp glare that he met with a smirk. It said many things, such as, 'it would not be good if you screwed this up right now, Fullmetal. If you be really rude, the whole mission could be jeopardized. You must respect this man.' Ed, for once, was compliant. He had to admit, if this magic thing was real he was a bit intrigued by it. Dumbledore cleared his throat slightly to get their attention.

"Well, Major Edward, I believe it is time to be off to the school. I shall be taking you by side-along apparition, and-",

Ed interjected here. "Wait a minute. I'm still not convinced. How do I know that magic really does exist and your not just pulling my leg?" he said testily. The man's eyes widened slightly in surprise as he looked at both of their untrusting glares.

"Why, I can prove it to you. Think back on when I first appeared into this room. That itself was a type of magic, called apparation. And when I very nearly escaped being torched by the Colonel, that was a simple spell to ward off attacks, called 'Protego'."

Edward was staring owlishly at the old man and started a bit as he finally began to take in how he looked. He had floor length –wait-were those _robes?_- on made of shimmering blue fabric speckled with shooting stars that seemed to be moving, a floor length beard, white as snow, a ridiculously pointy hat, and a nose that seemed to have been broken at least twice. He had a kind and wise aura around him, and twinkling blue eyes that made it seem like he was laughing about some inside joke only he knew about.

"-and I can demonstrate for you right now if you wish." Ed blinked and nearly said, 'what?' but before he could, the man twirled his stick and the Colonels paperwork burst into flames.

Ed gave in and let out a gasp, as did the Colonel, though his was one of joy. He thought happily to himself, 'YES! YESYESYES! That old coot just burnt a month's worth of paperwork! And I didn't do it this time, so Riza cant blame me for it! YES!'

Mustang stood up, walked over to Dumbledore, and was about to thank him. But then the paper stopped flaming, and everything was back to normal. Not a single burn mark anywhere on them. Roy stopped in surprise and looked through them. Nothing was burnt.

Then Dumbledore spoke up. "Well, there you have it, you have just seen me burn the Colonels paperwork and restore them fully. After all, I wouldn't want to destroy any important documents!"

Roy returned looking completely crestfallen and depressed and proceeded to bang his head on his desk. Dumbledore cast a worried glance at him and looked at Ed.

He explained, "Don't worry Dumbledore, this happens all the time. He's always looking for an excuse to get out of paperwork, so this is nothing unusual."

"Ah, I see" Dumbledore said with a twinkle in his eye. Well then, shall we be off?"

"Wait! Can my brother come along?"

"Sadly, Major Elric, no. You see, you also have to protect Harry Potter, and an empty suit of armor walking around would be too conspicuous."

"Well atleast let me say goodbye to him."

"Very well, but we must get there soon. You have to get accommodated to the school and seeing term starts in about half a month, that would be a good to get to..ehh..know how it WORKS." "Ok. I'll be back in about half an hour."

**And there you have it! The first chapter of my cross over. Plz to stay tuned for the next one!1!**

**CIAO! I think. Well. Whatavar! REVIEW OR EDO WILL BASH YO FACE IN.**


	2. apparation

**WELL, this is ch2. Like finished in the same day. I'm amazing : D well anyway. Guess what *looks around* I ACTUALLY OWN FMA AND HP! *random policeman appears and starts dragging me to jail* I WAS KIDDING!**

Dumbledore explained some more things to Ed. "There are many…odd things at Hogwarts Edward. And I'm sorry to have to ask this of you, but after you get yourself familiar with the school, I'll have to ask you to go on the train. You'll need to get to know Harry after all. Ed went to his room grumbling, "HMPH. Why can't Al come?"

Al appeared with a clanking of armor and said, "Why can't I come where, brother?"

"AGH! Geez Al! Don't sneak up on me like that! Well anyway…Mustang gave me a mission. I'm supposed to teach Alchemy at a…Magic school."

"Pfft. You have GOT to be kidding me. Magic doesn't exist. It goes against the laws of nature and Equivalent Exchange. There's just…no….way…right? Right, brother?"

Edward shook his head and had a grave expression on his face. "They have also assigned me to protect some Harry Potter kid. I'll have to go to the school, and get myself familiar with it. And after THAT, I have to be on the train with them too, to get to know him. I have about 20 minutes left until Fumblemore or whatever apparates me there or something. He also told me he would have to put a translation spell on me…I guess he had used one on himself while talking to us, because I did notice that his lips were moving out of sync with his words… I don't trust these wizards. But I guess I'll have to let him. I don't think that it would be very practical to have to cast it on all of the people in the school instead of just me. As soon as I learn it though, it's going to be taken off of me…"

Al smiled. "Well, at least you'll be good at your job!"

"Course I will! We've been studying it from the time we were three, it's not like it all just floated from my head when sensei left! And from what I've heard, these kids have very basic knowledge about even simple things like math and science. I would teach them like we were taught if I could, just leave them on a desert island with a knife and no –was it wands?, or the Briggs' Mountains. Remember those good old days? Ah. Well, I certainly have my work cut out for me!"

The two sat there reminiscing on fond memories, when Ed suddenly realized he had less than 5 minutes left. "OH CRAP! I gotta get going! Quick, where's Winry?" after getting hurried directions from Al, Ed ran to her room and opened the door. Winry was working on a new model for automail and Ed hurried up to her.

"Winry! I'm leaving soon. I got assigned a mission to gain Intel about…Magic."

Winry burst out laughing. "Magic? How old do you think I am, Ed?"

"Trust me Win, I didn't believe it either at first. But there's this guy named Trumblefore or something and he actually did it right in front of us. I don't really believe it but, I have to go. I'll be teaching Alchemy there and I need to know where the emergency tune up kit is for my arm and leg."

Winry looked at him and when she saw he wasn't kidding she sighed. "Does this mean you'll be gone long again?"

"…Maybe"

"Well, you better take care of my automail! No fighting serial killers!" "COME ON! That was only once!"

"THREE TIMES! THREE! Ugh. Well, if anything goes wrong with it…"

Ed laughed nervously. "OH! Wait! I have an idea! Pufflefore didn't say I couldn't bring you! So how 'bout it? You can stay with me, and you can make sure I don't kill my automail! Deal?" He grinned devilishly. "Hmm! You have a devious mind, don't you! Alright Ed! Besides I have to come to do your tune ups anyway! So we have perfectly good reasoning!"

"Indeed! Now let's go!" They rushed through the hallways of Central and got to Mustangs office just in time.

Mustang rose an eyebrow and said, "Fullmetal, why is your mechanic here?" Ed glared at him and said, "Well, who knows what will happen without her! If I bust up my automail, only she can fix it!"

"Oh? Well, I guess its ok with me. Dumbledore?"

"It's also fine with me. After all, we have no idea what automail is, much less how it works."

"Then it's settled! Quick old man, let's get going."

"Ok, but I must warn you, apparation will make you feel very sick after-"

"yeah yeah whatever! Let's just go." Chuckling slightly, Dumbledore said, "As you wish, Major Elric. Grab my sleeve and keep a tight hold on your friend there." Ed nodded impatiently and suddenly felt like he was being pulled through a very long and very _thin_ straw. Things were rushing past, but he couldn't stay still long enough to get a good hard glance at them. When the wild ride stopped, Ed almost kissed the ground, as did Winry. Dumbledore stood there and looked at them with raised eyebrows. "As I was telling you, you must always keep your eyes shut during an apparation, because even when they are closed, it always makes first time apparaters extremely queasy." He said all this with a tiny smile quirking his lips. Edward was fuming and glared over at him. "I need to sit for a moment. I think my mechanic does too." And indeed Winry was there holding her head between her hands to stop the spinning. After a few minutes, it was clear they were going to be there a while, so somehow Dumbledore made 3 chairs appear out of thin air. "Please, take a seat." Dumbledore said calmly. Ed's eyes almost bugged out and he said, "NO. I'll just stay on the ground." Dumbledore shrugged and said, "Ok then, I can make you a potion that will help with the dizziness. If that doesn't help, even just plain tea will." He waved his wand and large vial full of dark red liquid with black specks floating around in it. "I must warn you though, if you drink this, smoke will spout out of your ears for a few hours to come." Ed and Winry looked at each other and decided anything was better than feeling so sick. "Yes, PLEASE," they both said together. Dumbledore smiled and conjured up 2 cups. He filled them with the potion and Winry and Ed looked at each other for just a second. They both downed it in a few seconds and Edwards face turned extremely red, and smoke started pouring out of their ears. The color just clashed so badly with Ed's golden eyes and hair that Winry laughed aloud. Ed saw Winry's face and the bright color and smoke pouring out of her ears with her bright blue eyes and yellow hair set him off. Soon they were both almost rolling on the ground when they finally got up.

"Time to go." said Dumbledore.

**Meh. Cliff-hanger…? Lol. Well, here it is the second chapter. Now just press that magic little button down there….yyyeeeaahhhh….rrriiiggghhttt**

**Ttthhheeerrreeee…**

**-Sarah**


	3. oh dear

**Heh. I think I'm doing pretty well at these. I got two 1k chapters done in a day. I just need to edit them out now~ anyway. I don't own hp or fma. Never have and never will. (Sigh) Mk, let's get this straight. Things in italics are amestrian. And soon Dumbledore will place the translation spell on ed so he'll talk with an accent, as will winry. She hasn't gotten the spell on her yet, so shes all amestrian. Soon she'll get it put on her :p im sorry for the horrible accent, im taking it from my sister. its gonna be latin...i think :| any helpers would be awesome!**

When they got to the school, Edward and Winry's ears had just stopped smoking, as Dumbledore didn't want to have to apparate again. Suddenly, Dumbledore turned and said, "Ok, I will have to apparate the rest of the way, as you are still unstable and if I don't we would be walking for a few more hours. So, grab my sleeve and keep your eyes _closed_ this time please."

"Humph. Fine, fine you old man…" Ed grumbled. For that he got smacked upside the head with a wrench that appeared out of nowhere.

"AUGH! WHAT WAS THAT FOR YOU CRAZY WOMAN?"

"_Don't be so rude! I don't know about you, but I can hardly walk anymore! I don't have an automail leg, so I cant just go on walking forever on it_!"

"Argh. Well, that's true. Fine. Lets go old man."

He grabbed a tight hold on Winry's arm and an even tighter hold on Dumbledore's sleeve. He squeezed his eyes closed as tight as possible, and yelled, "READY." to Dumbledore. Dumbledore gave a little twirl and they were going through the straw again. When they landed this time, Ed had no support at all. His automail had given out on him and he couldn't very well walk- or even _crawl _for that matter on an arm and a leg. He fell on the floor with a bit of a shock, and Winry immediately went to his side.

"_Idiot, how am I supposed to know your automail is defective if you don't tell me anything!"_

"I didn't know either! It was working just fine, and then when we got in here it went and died!"

Dumbledore interjected here and said, "How does your 'automail' work anyhow?"

Winry happily started answering when Dumbledore realized he hadn't put the translation spell on her.

"Forgive me miss…"

"_Rockbell_."

"Miss Rockbell. But I'll have to put a translation spell on you. Please wait a moment."

Edward translated for her in amestrian, and soon afterwards, Dumbledore took out his wand and tapped it to all three of their foreheads while muttering something in Latin, most likely a spell.

"Ok now, can you understand me?" Dumbledore asked.

"Yep, clear as day."

"Good, good. Now we must go figure out how Major Elric's arm and leg work, and I can most likely formulate a spell."

The two went into an animate talk about his automail, with Winry explaining everything fully and with happiness shining on her face. Ed got bored in no time flat and decided to look around the room they were in. It was some sort of circular office, with strange gadgets plunking and popping and smoking, and a rather large desk with a plaque that said, 'Head Master Albus Dumbledore' Then the most majestic bird Ed had ever seen flew in through the window. He gasped a little when it landed on a huge perch he had noticed earlier. It began preening itself when it noticed Edward looking at it in obvious admiration. Dumbledore noticed and said, "Ah, Fawkes, your back."

The bird sort of warbled and its golden eyes twinkled merrily. It went back to preening itself and ignored all the others, though occasionally glancing up at Edward.

"Ok Major Elric, I believe I have formulated a spell that will allow you to move your arm. They work on electricity, no?

"Yeah, they get the electric signals from my brain to my nerves and allow them to move as if they were my original ones."

"Well, there was your problem. Electric things don't work inside of Hogwarts."

"Hmm? Why?"

"Because sometimes, muggles find us wizards a bit, how would you say, _odd_. They try to track us, but once we get in range of Hogwarts it gets short-circuited because of all the magic in the air. Unintended consequence, but a good one all the same. Well, now I should probably give my spell a try. It will allow your prosthetic limbs to work inside of the Hogwarts barrier by allowing it to recognize your own special electric signals. Do tell me if it doesn't work, I can always make adjustments on it."

"Mhm. Just do it already."

Dumbledore muttered a string of Latin, and when he was done Edward checked to see if his automail was responsive. To his surprise it worked, just as good as it always had. However, Dumbledore warned him to be careful.

"Something might happen to the shield and cause your limbs to give out, so don't strain yourself."

"Yeah, Yeah. Anyway, shouldn't we 'get to know the castle' as you said before?"

"Ah yes. You should get used to it. Be especially careful of the stairs and doorways, they are always moving about."

Edward raised his eyebrows at this and said one last thing, "Shouldn't you put that translation spell on us now? After all, you've only made it so the place works with my automail signature…"

"Ah, you're most correct. I'll put it on you in a moment. Tell me when you are ready."

"Ready as ever old man."

Dumbledore said, "Reddo Lingua: amestrian to English" while pointing to Edward and Winry. They both shuddered and got odd looks on their faces.

"Vell, that felt a bit odd, but it vas ok I guess," said Edward.

"Ja, Ja, it vas like a dictionary vas shoved into my head!"

"Vell, lets get out of here before zat man does anyzing else to us, Vinry."

"H'okay"

As soon as they left the room, they were on a winding staircase. Edward groaned and thought, 'Zis may take a vile.' They took a step, and suddenly it started moving. They got to the bottom in a little less than 3 minutes. A door opened and they left the staircase. When they turned to look at it, a grinning gargoyle was in its place. Edward looked at it curiously, and started to study it. Winry pulled at his arm and said, "Edvard….look….look at this place!" when he turned to face her he saw that she looked like she saw a ghost. Edward turned slowly and looked where she was facing. There were moving staircases, vanishing doors, and specter like things floating around. His face paled too and he said, "Zis may take a vile to get used to,  
>Vinry."<p>

**Vell! Dis chaptah vas fun to write! Made by moi, Ill leave you off till the next chaptah. Is it just me, or does I'll sorta look like 3 L's? or 3 i's? hm. I think its so it forces you to punctuate. I REFUSE TO OBEY YOU, YOU VILE SPELL CHECK! and i KNOW that muggles arent supposed to be able to see the ghosts and stuff, but isnt magic just a branch off of alchemy...? so...theyre...have magicall'y? meh. please review! every single one counts! and they do mean a lot to me!**

**-Sarah**

**(W-V C=k TH=Z) and thats pretty much it. ill try to stick to that key on the far left!**


	4. and we're off

**Augh. Sorry. If you havnt read my profile, then you must not know I had a huge writers block and a Microsoft word-less computer. DON'T BLAME ME IF THIS CHAPTER IS SUCKY! Hmmm I would like to say I totally own fma and hp, but unless my unknwn filthy rich great aunt or something magically shows up and dies, ill probably have ¼ of the money for the rights procured. *sigh* ok so Win and Ed got used to the castle. I forgot when Hogwarts starts and when the school year starts sooooooooooooooo. Lets say its june now? Well methinks that I said they would be there for about half a month, and I wouldn't like to explain how they got used to the caslte. They were there for like 3 weeks and they are both very smart so they got used to it, mk :D Al will probably be in the next chappy… he snuck in! you didn't really think id leave him out didja? He snuck in as…well, ill leave that for the next one…stay tuned!**

Edward was in the medical room. He had gotten frustrated many times before, but the castle annoyed him. So. Freaking. Much. He had resorted to punching it the first few days when they had invariably gotten lost- _often._ They had gotten used to it though, and Edward had found a library- a huge one in fact. It even had some books on alchemy, though they were all mostly gibberish, the only thing they got right was the first and second law of alchemy, equivalent exchange and preservation of mass, and just barely at that. He had yet to have been in the forbidden section, as he was too busy going through the rest of the library. Now. Back to the med room. Winry was telling him off for somehow managing to break a wall _and_ his automail.

"Ach, Vinry, it vas'nt my fault! It vas ze stupid vall! Zey are much older in ze library and 'arder! I vas frustrated!"

"Edvard, you don't go around punching ze valls ven you are frustrated! I tink you need some anger management…"

Edward snorted and glared at the wall while Winry was fussing over the slight dent on his 'knuckles'. He had gotten used to the castle, Dumbledore had showed him where his classes were to be held and where his seat was in the grand hall. When he had first seen that place, he nearly fell over trying to see the ceiling. However, after closely examining it, he realized he couldn't actually be seeing the sky, as there was the faint outline of bricks there, and no matter how tall a ceiling was, one could never be that high. He had soon gotten over the idea though, and found it was quite nice even if it was managed by…magic. Edward's lips still curled when he said that word. As soon as Winry was finished fixing the little dent, he left.

"G'bye, Vinry! I'll be in ze library if you need me!"

And so he went. He picked up one of the old tomes he had been working on when he had gotten around to punching the wall, but quickly discarded it. He thought about deconstructing it when he had seen it had the actual way to make a philosophers stone. Since it was a rather good book that had most of the information correct, he settled on tearing out the page with the instructions on it and tearing it up instead. Satisfied that no one would ever see it, he went back to skimming through the book.

-School is about to start-

"Professor Elric, the train is to depart in about 15 minutes. I shall apparate you to the station and give you a description of Harry Potter. Be sure to look after him.", said Dumbledore.

"Ja, Ja, but Dumbledore, vill Vinry be comingk wit me?"

"Of course I vill, Edvard! I can't leave you alone vfor a second!"

Ed scowled in her direction, but it was good natured.

"Vell zen, Dumbledore, lez be off!"

He grabbed Winry and Dumbledore's sleeve, bracing himself for the peculiar sensation that came with apparating. He felt a slight turn from Dumbledore and felt like he was being pulled through a very long and thin straw. He made sure to keep his eyes closed this time. When he opened them, Dumbledore said, "Now, Edward, this is what Harry looks like," and he gave Ed a photo. Ed plucked it from the old man's hand and saw short mussed up hair, black as night, shamrock eyes, and a mouth curved in a mischievous grin.

"Ok, Dumbledore. Which platform is it?"

"9 and ¾"

Ed nodded purposefully and grabbed a hold of Winry's arm. Dumbledore's eyes twinkled and he said, "Now I must be off. I'm sorry I cant show you the platform, as it is quite difficult to find. Now, goodbye!"


	5. on the train

**Hmmm…well. Hello everyone. Its been a while…-nervous laugh- soo! Ive been reading instead a' writing. Mah bad! Ill try to make this one extra long to make up for it! And I KNOW muggles arnt supposed to see Hogwarts and stuff but magic is a branch of alchemy…or whatever…..meh. Ed IS MAGICAL ANYWAY GUYS SO HES SPECIAL. Anyway, I don't own hp or fma, so don't sue…even though you probably wouldn't care as it wouldt be worth the effort to get It all together…so anyway! Enjoy! Also, thanks to **Kulapmiiitatiirs **(copy pasted right there, can ya tell?) for telling me which day school starts in harry potter land! Ill be sure to put it in ch2 or whatever place it was -_- Ed will e cencored because I wanna see if I can manage to do that xD anndd….enjoy :D**

"AGH. PLATFORM 9 AND ¾ IS NOT EXISTING!"

"Edvard! Quiet down, vill you! Don't draw so much attention to yourself!"

"Agh. Fine, Vinry. Just don't go all crazy vit the wvrenches on me, ok?"

"Hmph! Don't make me _have to_Edvard!

"Mechanic otaku!"

"Alchemy freak!"

"Automail nerd!"

"Fullmetal pipsqueak!"

"I resent that!"

"More like you _resemble _it!"

"Agh! Vinry, leave me alone!"

They were so caught up in their bickering match, they only stopped when an dreamy looking girl with almost white hair nearly ran Ed over.

"Oh… I'm sorry…I didn't notice you there…"

"Tch… vat are kids comingk to zese days…running others over..", Ed mumbled darkly.

"Are you looking for platform 9 and ¾ by any chance?" asked the dreamy looking girl.

"Vhy, yes, as a matter of fact we were."

"Well you sillies, you've been standing in front of it this whole time you know…if you go through that wall dividing station 9 and 10 you get station 9 and ¾…"

"Vreally? Vould you demonstrate for us?"

"Well I was headed there myself anyway, so of course, I suppose…"

Ed smirked as he saw the girl gather her things on her cart. Said cart had very, odd, things on it. Such as a loudly hooting owl and a book that seemed to be moving on its own. He did a double take on that, and wondered what could have made it like that.

"Oh! I didn't catch your name before…mine is Luna Lovegood. Pleased to meet you Mr…?"

"I didn't mention is but, Edvard Elric. Call me Ed though, it sounds like your trying to kill me if you call me Edvard."

"And im Vinry, Vinry Rockbell. Call me Vinry."

"Well Ed and Winry, just follow my lead and everything will turn out fine…" said Luna.

Edward watched her carefully as she went through the wall. She charged and then right when she was about the hit the wall- she vanished.

"Eh!" Winry practically yelled.

Ed shared the same sentiment but simply widened his eyes slightly in surprise. He walked up to the wall with Winry, casually leaned against it, chatting about things he didn't really care about. Winry caught on that he was trying to see if it worked, and work it did. A few seconds later he was in front of a bright crimson red train, one that had a model he was used to, not the sleek silver that was around now. He noted with some amusement that the train had nearly the same exact color as his trademark coat. Said coat stuck out like a sore thumb among the darkish neutral colors that currently populated the station, but he was the Fullmetal Alchemist. Since when did he care what people thought about him? A bored looking conductor was standing at a desk. Ed turned to him and asked, "Excuse us, but ven vill ze train leave for 'ogwarts?"

"11:00 exactly. Tickets please?"

"Of course." Ed said, giving him the two tickets that Dumbledore had given them earlier that day. He tore them in half and said, "Thank you, have a nice trip."

Ed half nodded in response and walked up to the train. It even had a tinder car! Things still in hand, he noticed Luna off behind the conductor. He nodded to her and she smiled slightly back. They went toward the train and got in through one of the many doorways. Last he had checked it was about 5 minutes until take off and most of the compartments were full. He walked through looking for an empty one and near the very end of the train, found one.

"FINALLY! I vas getting absolutely _sick_ of carrying all zis automail eqviuipment vith me!"

Ed smiled ruefully and said, "Vell, come on zen, ve don't vant it to get stolen you know."

Winry stuck out her tongue at him and put her equipment on the rack above the seats and gratefully sunk into one.

"Ugh, zat took forever. Vell, I am goink to zsleep! Vake me vhen we get zhere, Edvard!"

"Eh…no promises on zat, Vinry. Im probably goink to go to zleep myself!"

"If you do…I have a certain shiny silver object that is well acquainted vit your skull, zat vill be more zan happy to meet up again…" she said threateningly.

"You…you vwouldnt!" Ed said in half real and half mock horror.

"Oh I vwould. NOW STAY AVAKE. OR _ELSE._"

Ed shivered and mumbled something about sadistic blonde horrors and them trying to murder him with the wrench he himself bought.

"Vhat vas taht? I didn't qvuite 'ear you!"

"NOTHING! Er..I mean… nothing! Don't worry about it!" Ed said as his face beaded with sweat.

"Zahts vat I _thought_."

Ed stared at the blonde as she drifted off and wondered how she could be so caring yet so…_SCARY!_ She nearly rivaled _Sensei_ for Truth's sake! But he would never admit that these were the two people he was scared of. I mean a state alchemist has to have some pride and at least a good image to uphold! The Fullmetal Alchemist was scared of no one, especially not two _girls!_

Somewhere in Dublith a certain Izumi Curtis sneezed.

Since it was obvious that Ed wouldn't be getting any sleep he decided to read some of the school books. He was quite interested in the potions one because it was the one most related to science and had mathematical equations. When Ed was done with them, years one through seven, he decided to get out his notebook. He saw many interesting things going on in the apartment across from his. It was chock full of people he'd probably never see again and they seemed to be waving sticks and saying things. One of them did so and on the opposite bench someone flew up looking startled. Ed wrote this down in the form of sightseeing in his travel loge coded research notes.

(A/N I haven't actually cracked Ed's code. Just wrote some random stuff that mighta been in a travel loge xD its sort of related to the thing he saw though, no?)

_The wind is rushing through the grass and the train speeds by. Everything looks quite beautiful. As we pass by an amazing lake that looks as if it is alive, a fish jumps up and catches a minnow. Its scales contrast brightly with the soft blue of the sky and the hard gold of the sun. It sparkles for a moment; and then it is gone back under the water._

He shut his notes and relaxed against the bench. Soon the train would be taking off and some last minute stragglers were coming down the hall. They seemed to be checking in other compartments so he decided to read a book he found in the bottom of his bag. It was one from a normal library on mathematical equations. He hadn't seen it before and wondered how it had gotten there. It looked quite old and dusty and so it might have been good. He shrugged and started to read. Soon he had gotten his quill and ink out, almost gone crazy by how bad the book was flawed. He had just been correcting something when the compartment door opened. A boy with dark black hair and shamrock eyes poked his head in and said, "Oi, can we sit here? The rest of the compartments are full…"

"Yeah, sure iz fine vit me. You are goingk to 'ave to deal wiz the blonde 'aired monster though…", he muttered. As if she heard him, Winry moved in her sleep. Ed paled a bit and said, "Iz best for all our well beingk t'at you do _not_ annoy her in any vay. Good?"

"Err..sure mate..I guess…" said the boys red headed friend. His other one, a bushy haired brunnete glanced warily at her. They all sat with Ed even though there were 2 free spaces on Winry's side. Slightly annoyed by this interruption, Ed got back to correcting the book. Not soon after the compartment doors opened again. Luna was standing there and asked, "How have you been so far Ed? I've just wanted to check up on you…"

"Im doingk fine, t'ank you." He answered irritated.

"Ok…well I suppose Ill see you again soon…"

"Mhm."

Not soon after he was done with the equation and on to the next, the door opened yet again. This time Ed almost threw the book he had. But his respect for books was too high and he restrained himself. This time a pudgy looking kid with a bad haircut was there.

"C-could I sit in here Harry? The rest are full…"

"Yeah, sure Neville…"

The seats were full on Ed's side and so Neville had to sit with Winry. He was carrying some kind of lumpy cactus thing. He reached his arm out to Ed and said, "Hello! My name is Neville Longbottom!"

"Edvard Elric."

Harry seemed to have forgotten to introduce himself so he reached over and said, "Im Harry Potter."

"Im Hermione Granger."

"Im Ron Weasley."

"Edvard. Now could you please shut up?" Ed was _very_ irritated now. Anyone who knew him would back off for their own safety.

The golden trio looked miffed and was quiet for a moment. But of course the doors opened yet _again_ and this time a platinum blonde with two thugs was in the doorway.

"Well if it isn't Potty, the mudblood, and the weasel. It seems you have another person with you now, is he another sad mudblood looking for attention among Potty?"

Ed's patience had reached its limit. He took the cover of the ink pot, frisbee'd it at malfoys head, who only had enough sense to duck before it decapitated him.

"Get t'e _hell_ out you prissy little blonde." Ed noted with glee that the blonde was shorter than him by an inch.

"Well! Isn't someone a little angry? I bet you're a werewolf or a half breed of some sort!"

"_Werewolf? _What gave you t'at idea?_" _Ed laughed. "Werewolves are not existing!"

The blonde looked a bit confused and said, "But your…your eyes…"

"Vat about t'em?"

"Well…theyre gold…."

"Zo?"

The blonde gathered himself and said, "Well your still a probably a muggle or a mudblood! Ill bet your mum was just as flthy as you-"

Malfoy didn't have a chance to finish his sentence. Edward had gotten up, thrown down his book, walked over to malfoy and slapped him on the face-with his _right_ hand. Said slap made Malfoy fly a way down the hall and his bodyguards stood there looking dumb. Then they lumbered after him with worried looks on their dopey faces.

Ed yelled down the hall, "And don't you _ever _try to 'ave a go at mine mutter again!"

Ed stalked back into the compartment slammed the door shut with such force, the glass shattered. He picked up the book he was working on carefully and put it back in his bag. Then he turned to the glass. Equation bright in his mind he clapped resoundingly and put his hands to the glass. It gathered together again and was put back into the frame. He stalked back to his chair and his eyes now molten, the trio did notice that they were in fact the color of gold, matching his hair almost exactly. After a while of muttering he got out his research notebook and scribbled something in furiously. After a few minutes of the trio glancing at him warily and Edward going over the periodic table under his breath in an attempt to calm down, Hermione worked up the courage to speak.

"So…Edward…"

"Call me Ed. It feelz like your tryingk to kill me vhen you call me Edvard."

"…Ed…was that magic?"

"No. It vas alchemy."

"Alchemy? Isn't that a dead art?" Hermione asked looking mystified.

"Of course it isn't! You just saw me doingk it, no?"

"Oh…oh! Could you by any chance be..?

"Jes, in fact, I _am._" Ed answered with a smirk on his face.

"Harry! Ron! Ed; I mean professor Elric is the new alchemy teacher!"

**Ookkk… I decided to give loony an owl because I don't recall her having a pet and it just fit with her I guess. Look peeps, I need those reviews. I wrote six pages! I should at least get a sentence or two! OR ELSE. Or else what you say? Or else III make Edward use the language he is extremely fluent in-swearing people into oblivion. I also need the critique, and so if it's a 10 paragraph long essay on helping me or just a few words saying you love it,(or hate it…but you wouldn't do that to me…right?) all reviews are most certainly welcome! Tankies!**


	6. Im late! Im late! for a very imp date

HELLO EVERYONE. i have been looking for a beta reader and I have found one.

She is amazing. Her name is AdriElric1999 and she will be writing stories

also! we are each other s beta readers. i don t know how it will end.

but we will try our best. :D have fun! I worked Al in and i got a scene from my head finally

in the story~

*I don t own HP or FMA. If I did, Ed would be in lub wiff me.*

"Schei e! I m going to be late!" Ed rushed through the halls,

losing most of his papers that he hastily gathered from his desk.

he had set his schedule for the year to be solid, but flexible. but

that didn t really help if you didn t check the time. He had been in

the library, trying to find out how 'magic' (Ed still recoiled from

the word) worked, and had lost track of the time. he must have pulled

an all-nighter, because when he finally checked his silver pocket watch,

instead of 9 at night, it was 8:55 in the morning! he only had about 5

minutes until his class started! "FICKEN!" he shouted to the halls. the

last minute stragglers in the hall stared at him oddly but he took little

notice of them. he had a class to get to, for truths sake! he finally reached

the stairs, and when he saw they were still stationary, he sighed in

relief, and started to go up one. That s when it decided to start moving.

"Schei e..." Ed muttered under his breath. he started to walk faster,

pushing through the few students on the stair case. he started to move faster

as the stairs started to descend. when he got to edge of them he decided,

Ficken it! I vill just jump! and so he backed up a bit. the stairs were hovering, as if uncertain

of what was going to happen. then he sped up, and leaped off from his left foot.

he cleared it, only losing a small amount of paper to the long drop below

and a small crowd with gaping mouths and bugged out eyes were eating his dust!

He ran the rest of the way and got into his classroom just as the bells

tolled. As he walked in the room he sighed in relief once more and slammed the door behind him.

He stopped for a second to gather his papers and made eye contact with everyone

in the room for a moment, with a devilish grin on his face. When he saw

Harry, Ron, and Hermione in the front row, he nodded in approval and said,

"Guten tag, everyone. I am Professor Elric, and I vill be teaching you Alchemy this

year. Almost everyone in the class shivered in fear from the look on his face.

Dumbledore looked over the huge suit of armor that had arrived earlier that week.

It was monster sized, over 7 feet tall! the hallways were full so it couldn t

be put there, but the most confusing thing was, he didn t remember ordering a

suit of armor at all! he contemplated returning it, but it seemed to have been sent free of charge.

'maybe it was just a gift? we have bought many suits from there...' The old man concisely thought.

"OH! i have it! i know just where you'll go! perhaps professor Elric s room?

It is awfully drab in there, completely empty except for equations and

theories. He needs something to cheer the place up! Well its decided!

You, my dear suit of armor, will be joining Professor Edward Elric!"

he thought he heard a sigh of relief in the room, and he looked around.

"odd...well...it must have been nothing..." 


	7. the first day

I don t own Full Metal Alchemist or Harry Potter! All rights go to J.K Rowling and Arakawa Hiromu. BUT I STILL LOVE YOU EDWARD!

The Full Metal alchemist sighed and looked at his class. then he sighed again. then he proceeded to head desk. these kids didn t know middle school level science! except for maybe Hermione. she seemed pretty bright. he took a deep breath, went to the board and wrote out the periodic table. "Now. Who knows vat zis is?" Hermione s hand rushed into the air and started waving wildly, with a few others, though.

Much more timidly. he looked at her in approval, so he had been right after all. "'ermione?" ed asked expectantly.

"Well, sir,"

"don t call me sir. it makes me feel old. call me Ed, or at most, Professor Elric."

"Ok, si- Professor Elric... well it is the periodic table of elements, correct?"

"Correct! 5 points to Gryffindor 'ermione. you vill all need zis table zroughout

ze year. i vill 'ave expected all of you to 'ave learned zis by tomorrow, day after at most. are ve clear?"

"yes Mr. Elric..." the class groaned.

then Ron did it. out of stupidity and his comic relief personality*, he did

it. he whispered to harry quite loudly, "Oi...are we supposed to listen to this guy? i mean,

what is he, eleven? 'Cuz that s how old his height says..."

Ed wasted no time, went over to Ron s desk at an inhuman speed, grabbed the collar of his cloak

and yelled, "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT THEY COULD RIDE A GRASSHOPPER? SO SHORT HE COULD BE

MISTAKEN FOR A SPECK OF DUST? SO SHORT THAT HE COULD DROWN IN A MOLECULE OF WATER, YOU BEAN POLE?"

Ed stopped in the middle of his rant as he noticed the large crowd of white faces and bugging eyes

that were staring at him trying to kill Ron. Ed took a deep breath and dropped him on the ground,

and said roughly, "Detention. and if your even one minute late, you'll get it for the rest of the

week. If you try to skip out, the rest of the year."

"y-yes sir!" Ron stammered out as he scrabbled away back to his seat.

"Vell...back to ze lesson...the main steps in alchemy are analysis, deconstruction, and

reconstruction. analysis is identifying ze exact components of the object you wish to transmute,

deconstruction is breaking it down to its most basic atoms, and reconstruction is shaping it to your

wished form. But you have to keep the 2 main, concrete rules in mind vhile you transmute. Ze law of

natural providence and conservation of mass and are you taking notes on zis?" The class started,

and rushed for their quills and parchment. "Ze law of natural providence states that you can only

create something from roughly the same elements as the original object. for instance my specialty

as an alchemist is metals, and i can make almost anything from, say, this stone floor, because it

has many metal atoms in it. vatch please." Ed put his hands together with a resounding clap, and

placed them on the floor. there was a bright blue, electric flash and when he brought them up again, there was a 7 foot tall suit of armor stylized with a tricorn design, and a huge crater next to it. it seemed to be waving, and looking as cheerful as a suit of armor possibly could. Ed looked at it longingly, like it was a friend he missed, before he returned it to the ground, filling the crater next to it.

"Also, say, I break something. I could fix it back exactly as it was before, but I would have to make it exactly the same no, bigger or smaller, and I would have to have all of the pieces for it to work. see this clock?" he plucked an old ornate clock off the wall and held it out for the class to see. "Vatch." He placed it on the ground, and next to it he clapped. There was a small burst of the blue electricity and when he brought up his hands he was holding a huge mallet that looked like it was made of pure iron. he weighed it in one hand, nodded, grasped it in both and brought it down on the clock. With a resounding boom, leaving cracks in the floor around it, he brought up the mallet with his right arm and saw the cracks in the bottom of it. he rolled his eyes, muttering in something that sounded like German, and tossed it to the back of his desk. there it landed with another resounding boom. he said, "Please observe this clock. or what is left of it." the white faced kids eyes moved to the floor of the classroom, and saw the little pieces of wood chips, bent metal, and a rather sad looking pendulum. "This is all that was the clock. vatch." he clapped his hands again and placed them on the clocks remains. there was a small burst of light and when it faded, in his hands he was holding a still ticking ornate clock in his hands. instead of being dusty and a tad rusty it sounded well-oiled and its wood gleamed. he hung it on the wall and faced the class. "Zat is conservation of mass. so you see vat I m getting at?" he grinned devilishly at the class. when all he got in return was blank stares, he groaned and leaned against the wall. this was going to be a long year...

At the end of all of his classes, Ed went to his room. It had been a disaster all in all and not one of the classes understood what he was talking about, and all he really wanted was a nice long sleep before dinner. He slumped on his bed and lay there a minute, just relishing the feeling of not standing up. he laid there a second more, then his eyes snapped open. there was a suit of armor at the foot of his bed! "Alphonse?"

"Brother! you finally noticed me!"

"Al! How did you get in here?"

"Colonel Mustang sent me! He said, ' I thought you might have been having trouble teaching kids twice as tall as you.

"ZAT FICKIN COLONEL..." Ed yelled and grinned.

"Brother! You really shouldn t speak about him like that! After all he-"

"He's done so much for us, I know, I know!"

Al's face smiled as much as a suit of armor could. "At least we're together again."

"I missed ya Al."

"I missed you too."

"Besides...I could use a TA**!"

Al snorted. "Whatever you say, brother..."

"Brother why are you speaking so funny?" Al asked.

"Fumblemore put a magical spell on me and Vinry" Ed snorted and Al chuckled.

"does professor Elric seem, you know, odd?" Hermione asked. "I mean we have to memorize the entire Periodic Table, for Pete s sake!"

"I ll say, 'Ione. he must be a Nutter! Do you see the way he was dressed? It was like he was from the 1800's!" said Ron.

"Did you see that suit of armor? why was it shaped like that? It looked pretty scary to me, and he looked at it like it was a lost friend!" said Harry, "I mean, he just made it, right?"

"Yeah, it just doesn t...FEEL right!" Hermione piped up.

"Well, I ve got something for that! Time to break out the old invisibility cloak then, eh?" Harry suggested with a grin on his face.

"Oh- well- fine, Harry! Just don t get in too much trouble!" Hermione grudgingly complied.

"Got it!" he said with a grin that said he didn t, "No need to worry about me, I ll be in hyper stealth mode!" Harry said, nodding vigorously, then he wrapped the cloak around himself, and left the common room.

* This is actually based on what happened while I was writing this.

I was trying to write said, and Adri said Ron and guess what came out?

stupid. when Adri said Ron I automatically wrote, stupid! LOL! XD

**TA stand for teachers assistant noobs...T_T

Note From The Beta Reader: Hi everyone! I m AdriElric1999, I m SarahElric1999 s Beta Reader! She really enjoys all the sweet reviews ! Please keep sending them and check out my fan fiction it s a -Man and Full Metal Alchemist crossover called Switcheroo! shameless advertising for the win, eh?


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